"Wherefore, my beloved brethren, if ye have not charity, ye are nothing, for charity never faileth. Wherefore, cleave unto charity, which is the greatest of all, for all things must fail
But acharity is the pure blove of Christ, and it endureth cforever; and whoso is found possessed of it at the last day, it shall be well with him.
Wherefore, my beloved brethren, apray unto the Father with all the energy of heart, that ye may be filled with this love, which he hath bestowed upon all who are true bfollowers of his Son, Jesus Christ; that ye may become the sons of God; that when he shall appear we shall cbe like him, for we shall see him as he is; that we may have this hope; that we may bedpurified even as he is pure. (Moroni 7:46-48)
I don't know about you, but I can't afford to have my bucket empty. So, am I taking time to fill my bucket?
I love the "Have You Filled A Bucket?" Book.
Emily mentioned this book to me awhile back and since reading it with my kids they have come to understand that we are accountable for our actions and their effects on people. Do we help fill and build others, or are we dipping from their resevoir and breaking down?
It is important to teach our kids the effect of their actions so they can better act with pure intent to bring about positive results from their actions.
When we act with pure desires our hearts are light, peaceful and happy. We are positive and find strength beyond our own. When we are negative or harsh in our words and our feelings I believe that we would do well to search our hearts' motivations.
Here's an example: Nellie (2 years old) keeps coming out of bed when I've asked her to stay in (she knows how to stay). Do I yell and threaten? If so, is my motive one of love and trying to understand her real needs that she may not know how to express yet? (This is a real example I face almost nightly, so I recognize I am guilty of this, but am trying to work on it.) Here are some of the things going on in my head during this trial for me:
- it's past your bed time (time)
- you should be dog tired (logic)
- I want to do my own thing now after spending all day with you (selfish)
- your brother is already asleep. Why can't you be too? (comparison)
- please just do it. It's not hard to fall asleep (convenience)
- husband, come deal with this child. I'm tired (exhaustion--totally understandable moms!)
I'm sure there are many more. And these are so relate-able and understandable. But I know that as a Mom I need to keep these things in my mind, but not let stress rule my heart and actions.
If I take a minute for introspection to explore what I am thinking (and dig down to find the greatest motive of all--charity) then I can more properly place all these other thoughts and stresses. And that's exactly what all these competing thoughts are: stress.
If our minds are cluttered with various reasons and excuses then it's harder to act from pure motives.
Nephi reflected: “And why should I yield to sin, because of my flesh? Yea, why should I give way to temptations, that the evil one have place in my heart to destroy my peace and afflict my soul? Why am I angry because of mine enemy?” (2 Nephi 4:27).
He battles with some internal voices pressuring him to do one thing or another. But he had to take time for his thoughts and feelings, with a desire to get through them and find the purest motive/choice and then have faith to more properly place those voices and thoughts.
I find that as I acknowledge my stresses (tiredness, my desire to do my own thing, the late time that is ticking away, etc); but, then say "I choose to try to understand my child first" and let go of the other stressors, that my heart opens more fully and time slows down (as well as my pulse, breathing and volume! haha).
I need to do this more. This is using the atonement. Letting go of our incessant need to control everything.
"Be Still and Know that I am God." (D&C 101:16)
We are not here to control things. We are here to learn how to live with peace in our hearts and minds--in harmony with the things by which we are surrounding (including our family, friends, schedules, etc.). As we learn to introspect each time we don't feel peace, we will better understand how to make "course adjustments" and better find our pure motives that result in peace and joyful living.
I hope I can remember this lesson: to fill buckets with goodness and kind words; and that when I don't feel that way I will acknowledge my feelings and work through them by laying them down at the Saviors feet and praying for more pure motives of love and a desire to understand (as opposed to shutting those feelings off and feeling like I'm a bad mom who yells at my kids).
(And afterall...isn't this why Sacrament is the most important part of the week? A renewal of motive and pure desires?)
(And afterall...isn't this why Sacrament is the most important part of the week? A renewal of motive and pure desires?)
I'm having problems commenting. Ha! So this might come through a million times, but I want to say, thank for sharing this, and taking the time to write it.
ReplyDeleteyou're welcome. I just saw this comment. Sorry you were having troubles commenting.
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